Week 3 Story: Echo and Narcissus
Echo peered through the underbrush, and watched Narcissus. He was embarrassing himself, enamored with his own reflection.
He caressed the water gently with his fingertips, staring lovingly at his own reflection. He cooed sweet words that only he could hear. But she could understand the fervor that inflected his whispers, and she knew that it would quickly turn to despair. He was truly miserable now, even though he had not recognized it yet. She saw in his movements the longing that mirrored her own. For as much as he loved his own reflection, it would never love him back.
Tears began to fall from Echo’s eyes. All she could ever do was mirror, reflect, copy, repeat. She would have spoken his words back to him for eternity. But that was never enough for him; him, who would never have been satisfied with an artifice, who could only truly love himself.
This was not as satisfying as she had imagined when she begged the gods for Narcissus’s reckoning. His reflection would never reject him, never turn him away. He would never really feel what she had. And yet he was still pathetic, reduced to a thing that wants, that is defined only by its lack, and she wanted to look away.
An audience would see this scene and laugh. A crowed would observe and mock him. But she neither laughed nor turned her head. She watched him and tears brimmed in her eyes. Love can turn disdain into pity. Love does not believe in mocking. And she saw in his own futile longing a reprise of the fate that had overtaken her, and even in his folly she saw the nobility in a heart that can love so fiercely, even in the wrong direction.
When he died, Echo crept silently from the bushes. Her tears falling on his body as she caressed his lifeless face. She turned his body into a flower, pure and smooth as he had been in life, pale as he was now in death, and with a golden heart at its center, as her love had imagined him to have all along.
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| Echo weeps for Narcissus. https://www.pinterest.ru/pin/252764597811820183/ |
Author’s note:
I rewrote the story of Echo and Narcissus through the perspective of Echo, focusing on how she would have felt watching Narcissus love himself and then despair. I’ve always thought the story of Narcissus was humorous, but I tried to take it seriously for my retelling. Echo really loved this man. And when you love someone, oftentimes, you don’t see them the way others do. For Echo, watching Narcissus be foolish, pathetic, and ultimately self-destructive was probably not a humorous moment, even though the audience recognizes that Narcissus is an idiot. I also add a little bit to the story - I make it clear that Echo was the one who asked the gods to punish Narcissus, and I have Echo being the one who turns Narcissus’s body into a flower.
Bibliography:
Ovid, "Echo" and "Narcissus", The Metamorphoses. Translated by Tony Cline (2000).
Rachel, I absolutely adored reading your take on this story, especially as you focused it from Echo's perspective. It's been a while since I've read the original myth, but nevertheless you do a wonderful job capturing the emotions Echo would feel watching someone she loves. It felt genuine and sad, whereas the original myth is humorous like you said. I genuinely don't have any suggestions for you, the story is great as it is! With that said, I hope to read more of your work soon, it's beautiful to read!
ReplyDeleteRachel, I think you did an amazing job with this story. Even though it is relatively short, you packed so much emotion and feeling into these words. I believe your story captures many experiences of those in broken relationships. People will notice the pain, struggles, or problems of the other, not knowing what to do. They want to help them, but they also don't know how to do so; they also have the hesitancy of helping because they don't want to hurt themselves or the other in the long run.
ReplyDeleteHi Rachel, I enjoy to read your story. The whole story is full of the depiction of emotion and actions. In my view, they are really powerful for an author to show the characteristics of different character. Also, emotions and actions description would help you to show the whole atmosphere of the story.
ReplyDeleteHi, Rachel! Let me start off with pointing out that you're a fantastic writer. The way you spin your stories has emotion and impactful word choices. Like "cooed" and "caressed" -- they make your story feel three dimensional as I was able to hear the tone of voice and picture the scenes. Reading it from Echo's point of view was so heartbreaking because even if Narcissus' vanity made him cruel to her, she still had love and pity for him despite the punishment she brought down on him.
ReplyDeleteOne thing I wasn't sure about was the part where Echo shares that she requested he be punished. So instead of someone unnamed asking he suffer, was it Echo in this story?
One thing I would have enjoyed was maybe one, last lingering interaction between the two, just to really drive home what a tragic story this was. Love is blind, but in this case love was based off how beautiful Narcissus was, and I wonder if he knew that Echo's interest in him wasn't skin deep like everyone else would his behavior have changed?Again -- wonderful writing and I really enjoyed reading this!